I miss you..

Yesterday my grandpa went home to heaven. Now that he is gone and since I did not get too many conversations in with grandpa in the last weeks before his death I am wondering if people in heaven read blogs. Who knows? Could be possible, we don't know what anyone can do in heaven, Right?? I would like to think that all our loved ones watch over us and can see over our shoulder and read the little things we write about them. Grandpa I wish you were reading all the nice things people are writing about you on blogger, facebook, myspace, texts, everything. I miss you and love you and I wish I could have one more chat with you. I remember when I was about to buy a car and you were telling me about making sure I have my oil changed regularly and make sure the tires stay in good condition, you were always watching out for me. I miss laughing with you on the phone about something silly one of the kids said or laughing about how slow grandma was when she ate dinner. One huge thing is I wish Nathan and Sophie could know you like I know you. I wish every man were like you- patient, kind, loving, compassionate, giving, faithful and a believer in God. Those are just a few words about you Grandpa, I could go on and on for days!! I will always remember camping in Tawas and Kettle Point and you keeping up with our young fast legs on your scooter. I loved rainy days at the camper because we played checkers, card games, watched and talked about sports and had tons of great times. This week will be very bittersweet for me. I can not attend your funeral because I just don't have the money to travel and take off of work. You will be buried on Thursday and I wont be there. I want so badly to be there and pay my respects and tell you I love you one last time but I can't and it breaks my heart but I know you would never want me to drop everything and spend all that money to see you the way you are now. I did not see you while you were sick and wasting away to nothing and I think that was for the best. I will always have the memories of you the way you were before the cancer took over your body. I wish we would have talked more on the phone and I regret not sending the crayon pictures the kids made sooner. I know you can already see the things the kids made for you though. So yesterday Heaven gained another angel, John H. Clarke, my grandpa. I love you and will miss you until the day we all meet again.